This year has been a rough year. On top of financial issues, a completely dead muse (or a severe case of emotional writer’s block, or, simply, FEAR–you pick your poison), my mom passing away in late June, and the chaos that has resulted from that in terms of completely emptying the house of everything I’m not keeping, living alone for the first time in my life, dealing with the foreclosure of a house I’ve called home for 10 years, to the panic of where am I going to move to, what am I doing with my life, etc and so on and so forth. 2015 has just been… Not good. Enough said.
Needless to say, I haven’t been getting much done in the way of writing. I’d get a burst of inspiration and it would die just as quickly. And I’ve been hella emotional, like IDEK. But that said, I’m better than I was (emotionally) and I’ve been kicking myself for not having finished any works-in-progress that I’ve started (my last “finished” piece was Neverlost, last July, and I wrote that when I was (unknowingly) severely anemic). It’s like, c’mon Kodi, get it together! And I feel really bad because I know my fans (yeah, you guys!) are anticipating the follow ups that will finish up a couple of series (namely Otherside and Straydog) and I really want to get these books out to you, just life has been messed up.
So after a comment on my Facebook by the lovely Kait Nolan (who I’ve fangirled over since she wrote Red, tyvm) I’ve decided–you know what? It’s time to kick ass and take names. So maybe 2015 has sucked? Doesn’t mean 2016 will. I’ve wanted to be an author since the first grade. Since I told my mom that I was, quote-unquote, “a wordsmith” (what little kid knows words like this? Seriously?) And even though Mom is gone, I know even when it gets bad, and I’m scared, she wouldn’t want me to give up. She’d want me to push through the fear-block and write. Make something of myself, whether that be sticking to the independent path or veering off to a more traditional publisher.
Therefore: My ROW80 goals.
1: Make the commitment (despite the fear) to both ROW80 (and blogging) and to my writing. Even if it gets hard and I get overwhelmed and want to give up. Even if I shut my laptop lid in frustration and want to run away. I’ll take a deep breath and come back to it. Every day. Just keep writing.
2: Throw aside my writer ADHD and STOP SKIPPING TO THE NEXT SHINY IDEA! Gosh. It’s my biggest flaw, as a writer, imo. Pick ONE PROJECT and stick to it. The end. No matter what. For ROW80, this will be finishing a myriad of half-finished projects. Namely Wolfshadow, a revamp of Wildheart (adding content, mostly), and Bloodmoon. Three books that I definitely owe my fans, and by wrapping up those two series, it will give me the mental space to start something new 🙂 As well as a “confidence builder” free-writing project that I can play around with, experiment with, try to find the fun in writing again with.
3: Write for 1 hour per day. Log what I write, where I write, what I listen to, etc per day. Start holding myself accountable. It’s just an hour, after all! This means waking up an hour early and “eating the frog” in the morning, so it’s off my plate for the rest of the day (because I really will just keep putting it off until I’m exhausted), somewhat following the “stamina building” and such in this book: 5,000 Words Per Hour
4: Get through The Big Move. My first step outside my comfort zone, into an apartment that will be wholly mine…and my responsibility, for the first time in my life. This is scary stuff. (Looks like there’s gonna be a lot of pushing through fears this next year, huh?)
5: Get a “real” job, both to pay my bills (and be able to feed my two cats LOL) and to be able to have an income so I can save a bit each week, so I can outsource formatting/editing/professional cover art for my books, because I need to step up my game!
6: Get through the holidays! First Christmas without Mom, first Christmas in a new place. The holidays have always been freaking hard on me, but I need to push through and just…try and take everything with a grain of salt, even if that means crying my eyes out some days.
7: Ready myself mentally to start taking a college course in January. Try to work through my fears of “not good enough/not smart enough” for the career path that I’ve chosen. And stick with it, once I commit. (Because the whole ADHD-jumping-ships thing is a problem!)
So there we have it 🙂